The Bethie Bee

Apparently God really does work in mysterious ways.

An Israeli woman’s breast implants saved her life when she was wounded in a Hizbollah rocket attack during Israel’s war with the Lebanese group, a hospital spokesman said Tuesday.

Doctors found shrapnel embedded in the silicone implants, just inches from the 24-year-old’s heart.

“She was saved from death,” said a spokesman for Nahariya Hospital in northern Israel. The woman has been released from hospital.

Only in San Francisco…

There was actually a birthday celebration to honor Castro and his “accomplishments” in San Francisco yesterday.

In honor of Castro’s achievements - a socialist revolutionary who overthrew the corrupt government of Fulgencio Batista in 1959 and led the transformation of Cuba into a one-party socialist republic - San Franciscans across the political divide paid tribute to Castro during a spectacular evening ensemble of music, song, dance and poetry, including poetic recitals from San Francisco Poet Laureate Jack Hirschman.

Dance Brigade headlined the evening’s lineup performing a graceful mix of dance to a rhythmic assortment of Cuban standards while archival film footage of Castro was simultaneously projected onto a 30 foot canvass screen.

Krissy Keefer, Dance Brigade co-founder and Green Party candidate for the 8th U.S. Congressional District, wrote the performance’ accompanying monologue.

Keefer explained how the performance piece Happy Birthday Fidel came into being.

“The actual Dear Fidel piece was originally created last year when we did the first Cuba-Caribe festival and I did it as a tribute to Fidel Castro because Cuba and Castro were being so heavily attacked by [Secretary of State] Condoleeza Rice and the Bush administration.

“So the piece we performed tonight, Happy Birthday Fidel, was inserted to commemorate Fidel’s 80th birthday, which is being celebrated around the world.” .

“When we asked artists to perform they clamored to the event because in San Francisco Fidel Castro and the Cuban revolution have a big place in peoples hearts in terms of their social activism. They recognize the contributions of the Cuban people and Fidel have made on behalf of all the people of the world.”

Perhaps the most touching part of the eventing was the recitation of the poem “Fidel Castro” by Jack Hirschman–I must warn you however, reading the poem may give you the uncontrollable urge to stick your finger down your throat.

Check out the full story (including the poem) here…the pictures here are further proof that our next social program needs to assistance for hippies to get to salons.

H/T Babalu – “Aint No Birkenstocks in Cuba”